A Glass of Class: Not For Kids Under 21

Candy Crasher

1 generous handful of Warheads candies (make sure they’re all the same flavor)

3 shots Bacardi 151

2 scoops of ice

Blend the ingredients together, liquefying the ice and candies.

So, Calvin and I came into possession of a massive bag of candy this past week. As a testament to just how much willpower we have, we didn’t end up eating ourselves into diabetic blindness. However, this meant a good amount of candy was left in the bag by Friday. Neither of us wanted it taking up space, but we couldn’t waste such a glorious testament to how childish we are. So, I threw some Warheads (my favorite) into a blender, added some Bacardi and ice, and just let the bastard grind for a bit. What emerged was a frothy green abomination, challenging our sensibilities. It was an absurd collision of childhood and adulthood, gurgling in the highball; I’m almost certain I faintly heard it say “kill me.” We were less than enthusiastic about tasting what looked like a bad idea, but I manned up and decided to dignify my creation with a sip. I sloshed it around, looked into the glass, and took another; the drink’s tangy-sweet mix had just enough of a bite from the rum to make it taste right. We were astounded that such a stupid idea turned out well, but it looks like it did. Not only does it taste good, it’s a great talking point at parties when people ask just what the hell it is. I recommend, if you choose to embark on this trip into absurdity, that you experiment with it, though (especially with how it looks. Try to make it less…vomity.)

–The sweet and sour C & L

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A Casktail: Mind, blown

Dear beverage enthusiasts,

As I told you last time, I am going to talk about another project I’m doing with a good friend of mine, Kevin. Mid-way through a class, he texts me to check out a website. The last few minutes of class were creeping very slowly, and I decided to take a quick glance. I saw one word before the professor gave me a shifty eye: cask.

Sweet baby Jesus! A cask! Excitement ensues.

My friend’s idea is to experiment with a new beverage trend: aged cocktails. Basically, we’ll put a cocktail mix into an Oak barrel and then play the waiting game (3 weeks). As it turns out, there’s quite a bit of literature out there on the interwebz. This guy knows a thing or two, and it’s where Kevin and I are drawing inspiration from to devise our own cocktail recipe.

It’s all in the works right now because we just ordered our own barrel. 3 Liters of “aww yee.” The recipe is still in the works, but one ingredient we know we’re going to be using is the Irish Mist, an Irish Whiskey liqueur. Leave comments if you think you have a good idea for our cocktail! We’ll be sure to let you know how it goes, or we’d be bastards (tasting party, anyone? I’ll keep you posted through our Beverage Club Facebook page).

I’ll post some pictures when this badboy arrives.

GET EXCITED!

J Lo

Next time, I blast to the past with Sangria.

J Lo announces his project – part 1 of infinity.

Kind readers,

As the first post, I will share with you my foremost project. This will be an on-going project until… well, until I run out of friends (God-forbid it’s because I run out of booze).

My first-ever original creation took place just under a year ago. This was before I had my own Boston shaker and other tools (actually, I had converted my unused coffee thermos into a shaker which worked brilliantly—put the ice and liquids in, clap the lid on tight, shake, and then use the drinking spout as your pour!). But anyways, I was hanging out with some friends at my place, and I was looking for something more manageable than just straight booze.

I started with a few mixes and then finally settled on a particular mix. I was playing with some Mango Absolut and some random mixers in my fridge. After a bit of ‘this’ and a bit of ‘that’, I passed the cup to my friend, Seojin, who enthusiastically burst out that she loved the creation. Surprised by the reaction, I cheesily announced that this was to be her drink. The whole group of us brainstormed a name for a quick minute, finally settling on “Seojin Special.”

Then and there, my project was born. The goal of my project: to create and then name as many of my original creations after my friends as possible.

Seojin Special

Formal prep

1.5 oz Mango Absolut
Fill two-thirds orange juice (I like pulp; haters stay away)
.75 oz lime juice
Dash of grenadine down the side of the glass (ooooh, pretty!)
Instructions: Build in highball glass full of ice. Be sure to remember a stir-straw.

Party prep
Use some standard of measure (a shot glass, a red cup, etc.) to define your ‘part’.

1 part Mango Absolut
2 part orange juice
1 part lime juice
Dash of grenadine
Instructions: Build into a cup with ice, and then pour (roll) between two cups 2-3 times to mix. Color should be somewhat like grapefruit juice.

This is a great fruity drink that is basic yet sophisticated at the same time. The alcohol can be switched for virtually any flavored vodka/rum or maybe even gin. For all you experimenters out there, try the orange, limejuice, and grenadine together to know what the ‘natural’ taste of the mixers is without the alcohol. This way, you can further experiment with other juices and tastes of alcohols.

General notes: The party prep is much less concerned about presentation. It’s fast and it’s hassle-free. Given that we are all rather eager to imbibe alcohol at this juncture in our lives and that we just want to get something tasty down the hatch to relax the atmosphere, the party prep set of instruction will cater to this mindset. I assume that not everyone has all of the standard glassware to present the cocktails or the appropriate tools with which to create them.

The formal instructions are bar-ready. With these instructions, I assume that you have all the tools and resources to execute a professional-looking cocktail. This is for all you fancy-pants out there who want the whole 9-yards.

ENJOY, ALL YE PEOPLE.

Next time: I talk about a cask.

J Lo, out.

Attention all, J Lo in ‘da house’

Dear readers,

A hearty welcome to the online dominion of bevvies! My name is Jonathan, and in this first post I will introduce myself, explain my presence on the blogosphere, and finally toss you a favorite recipe of mine.

First, let’s get the name squared away. The name “J Lo” was a monstrosity that my sister brought to my attention when I was only in the second grade (the “J” from my first name and the “Lo” from part of my last). You. Could. Not. Realize. My. Horror. Let’s be honest, all you men out there, having your name related so closely with the cooty-infested species of girls was social suicide in second grade. I fought, and I fought hard to prevent this nickname from latching itself onto my being. Fast-forward a decade later… and now all we/I think about is that “junk in the trunk”! I can’t say I mind as much anymore.

So yes, I have now adopted the bootylicious popstar’s nickname as my own for the blog. To do the name justice, I will try my hardest to be the Jennifer Lopez of Cornell’s beverage scene. No guarantees, but I’ll sure as hell try.

Ok, name done. Now let me give you an abridged, “explain-like-I’m-five-years-old” version of what makes me J Lo. I am from a suburb outside of San Francisco, California. I love Jazz and Indie Music. I play Flute and Bass. I used to be in a band with my high school friends (shameless plug). I love to bake. I love to eat. And now, I love to make drinks.

SO! What am I doing here?

Simply put, I am here to bring the joy, the tastiness, and the greatness of the cocktail to you. In this blog, I will be sharing my liquid-related ideas and original creations with you. I will share my latest obsession. I will share my greatest dislikes. All shall be shared, and shared shall be all.

By now, you’re all probably incredibly thirsty from reading. Allow me to share my liquid love affair from this past summer. Thirst quenched:

Gimme Mo’jito

1.5 oz Gold rum (Bacardi Gold, preferably)

1 oz simple syrup (preferably made with brown sugar)

.75 oz lime juice (or half a lime)

4-6 Mint Leaves

Soda Water

Lime

Instructions: Place mint, syrup and rum in the bottom of glass. Muddle well. Fill glass with ice, add lime juice, fill with soda water. Garnish with lime wedge.

I like the color of dark rum. Sue me, I’m not a traditionalist. Here’s a fun paired reading.

Before I sign out, my friends wanted to make an appearance…

"Why hello there!"

-J Lo